At 3rd floor, "anxious" or "well-informed," Peeps at the Dollar Store, what are Easter eggs even for, and much more from this week in funny tweets.<br>
<br>
<strong>April 15</strong><br>
&nbsp;
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">This photo was taken by my coworker and it shows what I do best <a href="https://t.co/HisaudLOB2">pic.twitter.com/HisaudLOB2</a></p>
— i.hear.a.sound. (@ShellyOneida) <a href="https://twitter.com/ShellyOneida/status/1515146069289537536?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I love internet dating <a href="https://t.co/Zizg3Rze30">pic.twitter.com/Zizg3Rze30</a></p>
— Leon The Unprofessional (@LeonSkum1) <a href="https://twitter.com/LeonSkum1/status/1515185883586220036?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">New political movement just dropped <a href="https://t.co/f375NcC4gD">pic.twitter.com/f375NcC4gD</a></p>
— Matthew Randazzo V (@RandazzoTweets) <a href="https://twitter.com/RandazzoTweets/status/1515120524963168258?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">What if all the people "anxious" about "living with covid" are actually just "well informed"?</p>
— Covid is Airborne in schools (@AugersMonster) <a href="https://twitter.com/AugersMonster/status/1515110028461879296?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 15, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">people be giving directions like "head south" LMAO ok lewis and clark</p>
— T 🎯 (@CodeineFridge) <a href="https://twitter.com/CodeineFridge/status/1515013988974616577?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 15, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Dollar Store Peeps seen some shit <a href="https://t.co/PDZ2DS5nAT">pic.twitter.com/PDZ2DS5nAT</a></p>
— jonathan slater (@slater_jona) <a href="https://twitter.com/slater_jona/status/1514997265861074946?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 15, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script> <br>
<strong>April 16</strong>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/XmZKiELVXe">pic.twitter.com/XmZKiELVXe</a></p>
— Kiddos Being Weirdos (@KidsBeingWeird) <a href="https://twitter.com/KidsBeingWeird/status/1515426951590301697?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">"find the eggs i hid" bro it is 8 am</p>
— slate (@PleaseBeGneiss) <a href="https://twitter.com/PleaseBeGneiss/status/1515522799342825478?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 17, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">completely losing it <a href="https://t.co/zoJnGQtew0">pic.twitter.com/zoJnGQtew0</a></p>
— whorbius (@boreazepam) <a href="https://twitter.com/boreazepam/status/1515224781179736067?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Ladies and gentlemen, the Steven Seagal SNL in 60 seconds <a href="https://t.co/GMpX538HcM">pic.twitter.com/GMpX538HcM</a></p>
— Scott Gairdner (@scottgairdner) <a href="https://twitter.com/scottgairdner/status/1515371814632886275?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Picked up a hitchhiker today.<br>
He seemed like a nice guy. After a while though, he asked me if I wasn't afraid that he might be a serial killer.<br>
I told him that the odds that two unrelated serial killers were in the same car at the same time were astronomical.</p>
— soonergrunt 🇺🇸 A Capybara Appreciation Account (@soonergrunt) <a href="https://twitter.com/soonergrunt/status/1515372218544402436?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Delta sent an email saying to help the Ukrainian crisis by "donating your miles." The miles aren't real, guys. Your company could just help. What are you doing here</p>
— Kevin McCaffrey (@KevinMcCaff) <a href="https://twitter.com/KevinMcCaff/status/1515353070661734408?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">My accountant just googled when tax day is in front of me.<br>
<br>
I'm going to jail.</p>
— Matt Margolis (@ItsMattsLaw) <a href="https://twitter.com/ItsMattsLaw/status/1515458372308451328?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">facebook's "poke" era was insane</p>
— T 🎯 (@CodeineFridge) <a href="https://twitter.com/CodeineFridge/status/1515414981579186176?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 16, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script> <br>
<strong>April 17</strong><br>
&nbsp;
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">this person on tiktok bumped into the corner of their bed frame and made a really funny noise that has become a trend on the app, and i'm gonna start a thread of some of the ones that have had me weak af. 😂</p>
— Da'Shaun | they/them (@DaShaunLH) <a href="https://twitter.com/DaShaunLH/status/1515921082347409414?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 18, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">this is the first video i saw and there were real tears in my eyes 😭😭😭😭 <a href="https://t.co/Uk8yGoFEWG">pic.twitter.com/Uk8yGoFEWG</a></p>
— Da'Shaun | they/them (@DaShaunLH) <a href="https://twitter.com/DaShaunLH/status/1515921440033447937?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 18, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Happy Easter everyone!!!! Here's my favorite speech Easter speech. 💜 <a href="https://t.co/FFI8eoyqBx">pic.twitter.com/FFI8eoyqBx</a></p>
— Boobie (@BuddyNoLove) <a href="https://twitter.com/BuddyNoLove/status/1515673162326892545?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 17, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">eatin boiled eggs for the dead homie is insane</p>
— Zack Fox (@zackfox) <a href="https://twitter.com/zackfox/status/1515671425964818434?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 17, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">late nite snack <a href="https://t.co/oSkoxOk7sM">pic.twitter.com/oSkoxOk7sM</a></p>
— pull the lever fronk (@frankieplsrelax) <a href="https://twitter.com/frankieplsrelax/status/1515744819238244355?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 17, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/v9vVGBLu1L">pic.twitter.com/v9vVGBLu1L</a></p>
— Jasmine (@JasmineLWatkins) <a href="https://twitter.com/JasmineLWatkins/status/1515824431402307589?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 17, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/Oh1WQIq9D2">pic.twitter.com/Oh1WQIq9D2</a></p>
— letterboxd reviews with threatening auras (@letterboxdauras) <a href="https://twitter.com/letterboxdauras/status/1515710445843361795?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 17, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>April 18  </strong><br>
&nbsp;
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">update on my family's cancun trip <a href="https://t.co/XcrR9DtSyZ">pic.twitter.com/XcrR9DtSyZ</a></p>
— beast (@NiiicWiiin) <a href="https://twitter.com/NiiicWiiin/status/1516240263248855040?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">WALMART is giving out FREE supplies to anyone who can outrun the security</p>
— navi ✰ (@prettyboynavi) <a href="https://twitter.com/prettyboynavi/status/1516218277038489600?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">[in the back of a police car] the light's green you can go</p>
— Ordinary (@OrdinaryAlso) <a href="https://twitter.com/OrdinaryAlso/status/1516099553686134786?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 18, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script> 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">E-girl and her podcaster boyfriend. <a href="https://t.co/b7skGIRXUI">pic.twitter.com/b7skGIRXUI</a></p>
— SorryHat 𝕬𝖙𝖙𝖔𝖗𝖓𝖊𝖞 𝖆𝖙 𝕲𝖍𝖔𝖘𝖙 𝕷𝖆𝖜📓 (@sorry_hat) <a href="https://twitter.com/sorry_hat/status/1516230282034221062?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">That's tragically suspicious <a href="https://t.co/SXt801zb8D">https://t.co/SXt801zb8D</a></p>
— A Man With No Name (@SnottieDrippen) <a href="https://twitter.com/SnottieDrippen/status/1516103964244135938?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 18, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Worst guns and roses cover ever <a href="https://t.co/ZrHDhp3bbK">pic.twitter.com/ZrHDhp3bbK</a></p>
— Shoegaze Dad 🇵🇭 (@yeoldedad) <a href="https://twitter.com/yeoldedad/status/1516214670624899074?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">sometimes i'll be like "god i wish i were in bed right now." but then i'll realize that i actually Am in bed. and then it's not so clear what i want</p>
— charlie (@chunkbardey) <a href="https://twitter.com/chunkbardey/status/1516249104770379776?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Working your job while working on your mental health while working on your relationships while working on physical health while working on your family while working on sleep habits while working on self-care while working on exercise while working on personal goals while working</p>
— No BS Therapist (@TweetATherapist) <a href="https://twitter.com/TweetATherapist/status/1516039404397252609?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 18, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>April 19</strong><br>
&nbsp;
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/UnMHTWi51r">pic.twitter.com/UnMHTWi51r</a></p>
— cats being weird little guys (@weirdlilguys) <a href="https://twitter.com/weirdlilguys/status/1516617903629475841?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I never thought I'd see the day when "Yeah, but I don't want to get the virus that causes brain damage" was considered a fringe view.</p>
— Marc Coward (@MarcCoward) <a href="https://twitter.com/MarcCoward/status/1516490346045317133?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">You're not going to believe this… <a href="https://t.co/DkrJjhu4gO">pic.twitter.com/DkrJjhu4gO</a></p>
— Read Becoming Abolitionists by Derecka Purnell (@JoshuaPotash) <a href="https://twitter.com/JoshuaPotash/status/1516523202851266561?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">People: aRe yoU goInG to mAsK fOreVeR<br>
<br>
Me: well I still wear seatbelts &amp; helmets, use sunscreen, get vaccinated, wash my hands, drink pasteurized milk, cook chicken before eating it, &amp; don't drink water straight from the lake so 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️</p>
— Amy G Dala MD (@AmyGDalaMD) <a href="https://twitter.com/AmyGDalaMD/status/1516414810233135121?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">World heritage post <a href="https://t.co/yncEyZp8ki">pic.twitter.com/yncEyZp8ki</a></p>
— Kocurek1921 (@Kocurek1921) <a href="https://twitter.com/Kocurek1921/status/1516369936746176518?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 19, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/rFSuK4WLTF">pic.twitter.com/rFSuK4WLTF</a></p>
— Staten Island Bryan Ferry (@wyrdtweeter) <a href="https://twitter.com/wyrdtweeter/status/1516587759489761281?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script> 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Mickey getting dragged as part of an anti-LGBT campaign while Bugs Bunny is over here crossdressing since the Truman administration and nobody says a thing</p>
— Evan (@evan7257) <a href="https://twitter.com/evan7257/status/1516578835520753677?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">"I'm open to dating older women."<br>
--guys in their 40s talking about women their own age</p>
— Daley Haggar (@d_haggar) <a href="https://twitter.com/d_haggar/status/1516594094935486465?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>April 20</strong><br>
&nbsp;
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">most useless job is the guy who checks IDs at the wilco show</p>
— adult nine inch nails fan (@adultninfan) <a href="https://twitter.com/adultninfan/status/1516920368677728256?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">One thing about 3pm is she is the end of the day</p>
— Caitie Karasik (@caitieekk) <a href="https://twitter.com/caitieekk/status/1516899572227854336?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Snickers HQ <a href="https://t.co/67jQ3BnwYY">pic.twitter.com/67jQ3BnwYY</a></p>
— All Watched Over By Machines of Drum and Bass (@bartlebooth45) <a href="https://twitter.com/bartlebooth45/status/1516840164278120448?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script> 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">sometimes you'll see someone biking wearing a hat instead of a helmet and it's like omg!! so close 💕💕</p>
— charlie (@chunkbardey) <a href="https://twitter.com/chunkbardey/status/1516905431771320321?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">This is an actual screenshot from Newsmax. I did not edit this. <a href="https://t.co/zTevhmwMAH">pic.twitter.com/zTevhmwMAH</a></p>
— Jason Campbell (@JasonSCampbell) <a href="https://twitter.com/JasonSCampbell/status/1516751349337268227?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>


<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Gonna be amazing when it turns out the two best entertainment business models are theatrical movies and ad-supported television.</p>
— Aditya Sood (@adityasood) <a href="https://twitter.com/adityasood/status/1516792850641424385?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 20, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  &nbsp;

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I wonder if there is any correlation between Netflix arbitrarily canceling beloved shows and subscriber attrition. Hmmmm.</p>
— roxane gay (@rgay) <a href="https://twitter.com/rgay/status/1517025507488919552?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 21, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">netflix's death spiral is the most entertaining thing they've produced in years</p>
— alex (@shitshowdotinfo) <a href="https://twitter.com/shitshowdotinfo/status/1517039988772380673?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 21, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script> 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Amber Heard's lawyer grills Johnny Depp about whether he took drugs with Marilyn Manson.<br>
<br>
"I once gave Marilyn Manson a pill so that he would stop talking so much." Depp testifies.</p>
— Jacob Shamsian (@JayShams) <a href="https://twitter.com/JayShams/status/1517154918200664064?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 21, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>  

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I'm not saying that The Masked Singer is a sign that we're living in a dystopia, but it's definitely the kind of show that the characters would watch in a movie about living in a dystopia.</p>
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) <a href="https://twitter.com/joshgondelman/status/1517126532166213632?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 21, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">according to the 800 ants on my counter this morning the small sticky spot next to my toaster is LA's newest hottest social event</p>
— Matt O'Brien (@matt_obrien) <a href="https://twitter.com/matt_obrien/status/1517207297348440064?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">April 21, 2022</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

Vish Khanna

This Funny Week in Funny Tweets: April 22, 2022

Latest Coverage