Skateboarding is a crime, the Millennial / Gen Z lime, don't say "before times," Giannis in his prime, and much more from this week in funny tweets.<br>
<br>
<strong>July 16</strong>
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I guess we should retire the expression "avoid it like the plague", given how little effort people seem to be willing to go to to avoid plagues.</p>
— matt blaze (@mattblaze) <a href="https://twitter.com/mattblaze/status/1416079978022768640?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 16, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I'm still wearing a mask in public, partly because a man hasn't told me to smile in over a year.</p>
— Lil Bit 🌈 (@LizerReal) <a href="https://twitter.com/LizerReal/status/1416121475942260745?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 16, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">If you're keeping score at home, that's 0.006%. <a href="https://t.co/vT526ajmay">https://t.co/vT526ajmay</a></p>
— Brendan Nyhan (@BrendanNyhan) <a href="https://twitter.com/BrendanNyhan/status/1416132611576041472?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 16, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>July 17</strong>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/lJqgOYYncO">pic.twitter.com/lJqgOYYncO</a></p>
— "" (@BRYCELOVESJESUS) <a href="https://twitter.com/BRYCELOVESJESUS/status/1416546049599094791?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 17, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">My kid discovered you can photocopy anything and now he's trying to prank me <a href="https://t.co/tY71XeHer1">pic.twitter.com/tY71XeHer1</a></p>
— Jennifer Griffin Graham (@jgriffingraham) <a href="https://twitter.com/jgriffingraham/status/1416488778122866690?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 17, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Facts😂 <a href="https://t.co/Ps6pOcwcDH">pic.twitter.com/Ps6pOcwcDH</a></p>
— The Chosen Won🐍🏁 (@A2K4Life) <a href="https://twitter.com/A2K4Life/status/1416531171110834178?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 17, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">generations are mostly fake but i have arbitrarily decided that the millennial / gen-z line is whether this joke lands <a href="https://t.co/MfJlAE9mZs">pic.twitter.com/MfJlAE9mZs</a></p>
— cal50 (@cal50) <a href="https://twitter.com/cal50/status/1416501462562115586?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 17, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">i found a loophole <a href="https://t.co/u5lO9JqykB">pic.twitter.com/u5lO9JqykB</a></p>
— everett byram (@rad_milk) <a href="https://twitter.com/rad_milk/status/1416523646303051778?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 17, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/QUBNjiBbqV">pic.twitter.com/QUBNjiBbqV</a></p>
— the thicc husband &amp; father (@lukeisamazing) <a href="https://twitter.com/lukeisamazing/status/1416532194810531842?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 17, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>July 18</strong>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Bigfoot titty slide Bigfoot titty slide Bigfoot titty slide <a href="https://t.co/A5UGhqPzbZ">pic.twitter.com/A5UGhqPzbZ</a></p>
— Dash Kwiatkowski (@DashKwiatkowski) <a href="https://twitter.com/DashKwiatkowski/status/1416776691108749317?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 18, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">the last thing you see before the rent goes up $400 <a href="https://t.co/UoHhBhp9ns">pic.twitter.com/UoHhBhp9ns</a></p>
— River (@river_is_nice) <a href="https://twitter.com/river_is_nice/status/1416874969590554628?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 18, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Thinking about the time i almost got mugged in italy and they asked where i was from and i said palestine and they gave me back my wallet</p>
— henri (@ihavefatballs) <a href="https://twitter.com/ihavefatballs/status/1416817381930946568?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 18, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">young elon musk vs young ben shapiro, who would win? <a href="https://t.co/JsQD218Dj4">pic.twitter.com/JsQD218Dj4</a></p>
— meuw (@meowmeowmia) <a href="https://twitter.com/meowmeowmia/status/1416889520180666371?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 18, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">if anyone's terrified of commitment just date an anti-vaxxer they won't be around for long</p>
— Sarah Beattie (@nachosarah) <a href="https://twitter.com/nachosarah/status/1416818520256565252?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 18, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I hate when dates are just talk about boring work stuff like passwords and guard rotations at the research facility you work at</p>
— one note parody account devolved into railing abou (@walkingjalopy) <a href="https://twitter.com/walkingjalopy/status/1416957916330881025?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 19, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>July 19</strong>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">susan "b. shopping" anthony</p>
— Bailey Moon (@Baileymoon15) <a href="https://twitter.com/Baileymoon15/status/1417223364276592640?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 19, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Just watch my man in the back <a href="https://t.co/QRe4W3Wpwl">pic.twitter.com/QRe4W3Wpwl</a></p>
— Brian Floyd (@BrianMFloyd) <a href="https://twitter.com/BrianMFloyd/status/1417109243061145605?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 19, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/KA7LgIeRBJ">pic.twitter.com/KA7LgIeRBJ</a></p>
— 80s News Screens (@80snewsscreens) <a href="https://twitter.com/80snewsscreens/status/1417312995391287309?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 20, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Two women on the restaurant patio with me VERY LOUDLY discussing the reasons one is dropping her son from the will and, look, if you're out there, Scott, I have to agree you've had this coming.</p>
— Kevin M. Kruse (@KevinMKruse) <a href="https://twitter.com/KevinMKruse/status/1417148389888823303?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 19, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">I can't take the phrase "the before times" seriously; it has real "doggo" energy</p>
— Tajja Isen (@tajjaisen) <a href="https://twitter.com/tajjaisen/status/1417176873537261569?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 19, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>July 20</strong>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">they have to say human because of scrooge mcduck <a href="https://t.co/BQmsz4Ps7r">pic.twitter.com/BQmsz4Ps7r</a></p>
— Ben Rosen (@ben_rosen) <a href="https://twitter.com/ben_rosen/status/1417535593056071683?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 20, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">when you can't settle on a theme for your 11th birthday <a href="https://t.co/kyMJ9QkoOJ">pic.twitter.com/kyMJ9QkoOJ</a></p>
— uncle of the month (@DaveMcNamee3000) <a href="https://twitter.com/DaveMcNamee3000/status/1417542817165967366?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 20, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">It's so funny to learn about an American companies history and then you get to the 1933-1945 section</p>
— Spaghetti Joe (@Spagh3ttiJoe) <a href="https://twitter.com/Spagh3ttiJoe/status/1417667655931252737?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 21, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Somebody broke into my car last night and accidentally dropped $400 into the crack of the seat. Ain't that some shit.</p>
— zi (@9ABBAZII) <a href="https://twitter.com/9ABBAZII/status/1417488767816978436?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 20, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Prayers up for that one porta potty. <a href="https://t.co/wGthkeZae6">pic.twitter.com/wGthkeZae6</a></p>
— Andy Nesbitt (@anezbitt) <a href="https://twitter.com/anezbitt/status/1417653561870200839?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 21, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>July 21</strong>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/kDPONWZ0tM">pic.twitter.com/kDPONWZ0tM</a></p>
— Poorly Aged Things (@PoorlyAgedStuff) <a href="https://twitter.com/PoorlyAgedStuff/status/1417863796606095369?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 21, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="und" dir="ltr"><a href="https://t.co/bF90iWD3Bt">pic.twitter.com/bF90iWD3Bt</a></p>
— Axe🗿🇵🇸 (@westernunion2k) <a href="https://twitter.com/westernunion2k/status/1417849639772950533?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 21, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Giannis took the trophies to Chick-fil-A and ordered 𝐞𝐱𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲 50 nuggets.<br>
<br>
Amazing scenes 😂 <a href="https://t.co/PSAMuoO3TM">pic.twitter.com/PSAMuoO3TM</a></p>
— SportsCenter (@SportsCenter) <a href="https://twitter.com/SportsCenter/status/1417878127058030596?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 21, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">How can you not love Giannis Antetokounmpo?? He has the body of a Greek god and the personality of a Greek diner owner</p>
— eli yudin (@eliyudin) <a href="https://twitter.com/eliyudin/status/1417983983485337600?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 21, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script><br>
<strong>July 22</strong>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">deff getting worried about all these covid variants, if college taught me anything once u start seeing greek letters everywhere u need to run</p>
— first-mate prance (@bocxtop) <a href="https://twitter.com/bocxtop/status/1418308069876899843?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 22, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Told my landlord we had ants and he said "We cannot kill them. We can not outsmart them. They have been here longer than us. They will find a way."</p>
— Grace Freud (@GraceGFreud) <a href="https://twitter.com/GraceGFreud/status/1418220284427923457?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 22, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">a job i wish they still had is town crier. i was born to run down main street shrieking the news</p>
— trash jones (@jzux) <a href="https://twitter.com/jzux/status/1418227591379521542?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 22, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">Woke up from my nap and see NFL players talkin bout they ready to retire rather than getting the vaccine because they "standing for something" but when it was time to stand up for Kap them boys talked about how they got mouths to feed and cant miss out on those checks</p>
— Quan (@QuanDBtalk) <a href="https://twitter.com/QuanDBtalk/status/1418325898961596423?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 22, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
<p lang="en" dir="ltr">So a vaccine that's proven to be wildly effective and protects people against a potentially deadly virus will get a NFL player to retire but not the threat of imminent brain trauma that they expose themselves to every game. Got it.</p>
— Jemele Hill (@jemelehill) <a href="https://twitter.com/jemelehill/status/1418318602617319425?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">July 22, 2021</a></blockquote>
<script src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script>

Vish Khanna

This Funny Week in Funny Tweets: July 23, 2021

Latest Coverage