The Medallion

Hong Kong super-cop Eddie Yang (Jackie Chan) travels to UK Interpol headquarters to help his bumbling ex-partner (Lee Evans) and his former flame (Claire Forlani) stop the evil Snakehead (Julian Sands) from kidnapping a boy who has power over a mysterious medallion. To follow, some words of advice for future filmmakers: don't name your protagonist "Snakehead"; don't endow every character in the movie with a black belt in Matrix (unless it is the Matrix, or a sequel thereof); don't alter the speed of the filming so drastically that viewers get nauseous (it didn't work for Toys); don't have your leads re-enact a tender scene originally performed by Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock; don't dub words over characters whose lips aren't moving; don't compile a soundtrack that's a mixture of Disney and James Bond music; and whatever you do, don't make a romantic pair of leads whose entire lack of chemistry makes the audience visibly cringe when they kiss. In short, don't do what The Medallion did. The Medallion is interesting for anyone under the age of 12, or who wants to take it purely as a concept film. There is a neat sort of twist on the "magical life force trinket theme," but the incredibly corny execution and obviousness makes it almost painful to sit through. Chan's agility still impresses, but Evans gets the most laughs as his seriously dense sidekick (though one can only wonder if he realised the camera was zooming in that closely). Forlani is a baffling choice in this role, and as for the romance between her and Chan, there's only one thing to be said: gross. (Columbia)